The day you discover you are pregnant, once reality sets in and you completely understand that “this is really happening”, one of the first things that may run through your mind is “Will I be a good mom?”. It won’t be the last time you think that either. You’ll have 9 long months to ponder the question. 9 long months to fret and worry and prepare as well as you can. 9 long months to gather information and inform yourself about this little life that you will be bringing into the world.
You will sit there, alone at times, just you and your baby, holding your belly, waiting to feel the first movements. After the first movements you’ll wait for your first kick. Once the kicks begin on a regular basis you will find yourself stressed out when you don’t feel a kick. You’ll panic and be worried like never before. Believe me when I tell you that this is just the beginning of being worried. Just the fact that you are worrying means you’re already becoming a mother. You’re in training so to say.
When the day finally arrives and baby is here, your life will change forever. You’ll see their beautiful face and once again that same old question will arise. “Will I be a good mom?”. The only person that can answer that question, is you. It is not something that can be put into words either. It is something you will answer by the actions you choose.
No matter how much you read or how much advice you’re given you will find yourself in new territory. Oooh you may have helped raise a brother or sister, or a good friends baby.. but when it comes time to raise your own it’s a whole other story, one that you write yourself. You are the main star. The star in that babies life. The light that shines in the darkness when times are tough. The one that baby looks to in order to learn how to live. You are here on this earth to protect that baby. This is the most important part you will ever play. If you thought being a sister, aunt, or daughter was tough then you are in for a surprise.
The moment you and your baby are alone for the first time you will understand that this is what life is about. All the things you’ve learned along the way are coming into play now. You will feel that the world is a beautiful place, even in all it’s ugliness. All those mistakes you made throughout your life, even if they are few will come flooding into your thoughts. You’ll tell yourself that you never want your child to do or say such things. You never want harm to come to this child and you want them to grow up to be a wonderful, loving and caring person and to know that they are truly loved.
You may have met some unscrupulous people in your lifetime that told you they couldn’t imagine you being a mother or you may have argued with your spouse or significant other about how you would raise your child. All that goes flying out the window once baby arrives. It’s like no comments, no amount of criticism can take away your happiness. You’re on top of the world. Even if that nurse in the delivery room was a little snotty, or your mother-in-law insisted on being there at the birth. None of that matters! Let it all go. Now is your time to shine. Now is your time to prove to yourself and others that you can do this. Don’t let anyone else make you think that you can’t.
I won’t say that all you need is love in order to be a parent because that is not true. You need love, devotion, caring, education, a good work ethic, morals and a million other things. You need to be the best person you can possibly be.. and you need to surround yourself with other good people. Ones that encourage you and that love your baby just as much as you do (even though as mothers we feel that is not possible). You have a new “job” in life and above all else your baby is your top priority. If you never forget any of these things and you try your hardest against all odds you will know that you are a good mother and NO ONE can take that away from you. Ever.