It’s not often I blog about what’s really going on in my personal life. Yes I blog about my kids and the fun and the happiness, but it’s very rare that I use this space for any negativity.
When I first started my blog I wanted to say whatever came over me. I was in a bit of a dark place and needed an outlet, but once I started getting more involved with other Mom’s online, reading their stories, sharing their sadness.. I decided that it was really a waste of time to do so much complaining and that it would be better to use my blog as a source of positivity in my life.
After I started reviewing products I especially felt the need to keep things positive because sometimes in the Mommy blogging world there can be these unwritten rules about things you should and should not talk about. The one thing I’ve found, no matter if it’s a controversial blogger who loves to says what she wants whenever she wants, or it’s your homeschooling, church going mom who doesn’t have a bad bone in her body.. they don’t blog about their husbands, mothers, in-laws or significant others in a negative light. As a matter of fact I’ve seen several posts that somewhat dictate the unwritten rules and number 1 on that list is “don’t blog about other people ” (except your kids of course). It’s almost like if you do such things you’ll be shunned.
Well, it’s really been bothering me lately because I want my readers to relate to me. I really want to write what life is like when it’s not perfect but on the other hand I don’t want my writing to bring other people down! I hate bringing other people down with my bullshit. I don’t want to be what some people refer to as a psychic vampire. Someone who has so much drama that they literally suck the life out of you.
Unfortunately I’ve had a ton of drama in my personal life lately and to be honest it has started to make me sick. This last pregnancy I started getting high blood pressure and it never really went away. I don’t eat much salt or processed foods and things like that just in attempts to stay healthy and I’ve noticed that when the drama begins and I get annoyed I start feeling sick. Not just the typical stomach hurting sort of thing.. I’m talking head spinning, about to explode, vision going blurry, high blood pressure.. I’m about to have a freaking stroke any minute type of thing. That really scares me because my Grandmother started having strokes in her 40’s and I don’t want that to be me!
Soooo where am I going with all of this? Well, this is a warning I guess. I’ve had it.. I can’t take it anymore. I have to talk.. I have to get it out of my system. That’s how I work…. I have to take my blog back and talk about the things that matter most to me. I’ve been doing a lot of reviewing and I’ll continue that because I love it and it helps keep my mind working after watching too many episodes of the Fresh Beat Band and too many nights of 4 hours of sleep… but…. I am going to start writing again about my life.. and first on the agenda when I get a moment to myself.. Disowning family members who make you physically ill. I’ll keep it somewhat clean but damnit I have the right to speak the truth and stop keeping other peoples shit on my shoulders for the sake of my own health if nothing else. After all if you can’t take care of yourself, how can you take care of your family? Time to stop putting me last.
Screw the Mom bloggers code of make-believe ethics. Let’s get real.
